EPISODE 140: [STORYTIME] Do These Things NOW & Thank Yourself Later

 

 

Have you ever looked at someone and wondered what makes someone the way that they are? Whether its because they are a super fit person or super self-assured, everyone is the way they are because of the actions and decisions they have made in the past. We are all a result and byproduct of our pasts and the lives we have lived. 

 

In today’s episode, I am walking you through some of the decisions and actions I have made, but personally and professionally, that I *truly* believe have made all the difference. If you do these things now, your future self will thank you!  

 

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[EPISODE TRANSCRIPT]

Maddy 0:01 Hey bestie and welcome to the living in sunshine podcast. I’m your host, Maddy fry. And around here we are all about encouraging, inspiring, and giving you the tough love that you need to hear to get out there and live as your best self. Each and every Wednesday, you can expect to learn tangible tips to help you find your bigger purpose, be given simple action steps that you can take in order to make progress toward your biggest dreams. And hear how you can purposely pursue joy on the daily. So sit down, grab your favorite drink. And let’s have a girl chat. This is the living in sunshine podcast. Good morning. Good morning, my dudes. And welcome back to the living in sunshine podcast, I am so pumped that you are tuning in for another brand new episode. Because in today’s new episode, I am sharing with you some of the biggest things that I did in my own personal life that now me is thinking past me for doing. And I’m sharing these with you today because I hope that they inspire you to implement them in your own life, or really reflect on things that you have done in the past your past self has done in order to really support you and guide you into getting to where you are now. Because sometimes I feel like we are in a certain season of life or we’re in a certain, you know, headspace or mindset or whatever, whether we’re thriving or not. And we kind of forget that we got to where we are because of the decisions and the actions that we took or did not take in the past. And I just think that it’s really interesting to stop and reflect on the things that we have done in our past the decisions that we have made, and really kind of track and trace, okay, wow, I am this way because I did this or I said this or I decided to do this. And I just think that it’s really, really interesting to think about. And I was thinking about this about my own life. And I was like, wow, I wish that I would have known to do these things sooner. Or I wonder where I could have been if someone told me to do these things, and I did them. And instead of them being you know more of a happy accident, but more so an intentional decision. I would you know, where would it be now? Right. So I have a few things, both for life and for business because I know I have a lot of business owners, or budding business owners who listen to the show that I’m going to share with you today that I did, both intentionally and not that have gotten me to where I am today. Before we dive into this episode, though, I do want to ask that you rate and follow the show wherever you’re listening to it right now. Ratings and reviews help your podcasts that you listen to all the time, so so so much, because it’s essentially the same as giving it a LIKE or a follow over on Instagram. And it just pushes the show out to more women, just like yourself. So if you haven’t left the show a rating or review yet, pause, go do that right now. It literally takes 15 Seconds or Less doesn’t take too long. And it means the world to me. Once you have done that. Let’s go ahead and dive right into today’s new episode. Okay, so like I was saying, the things that I’m going to share with you in today’s episode are things that I have done years ago, maybe even a year ago, that now me the current version of myself is so thankful that I did, because I wouldn’t be the person that I am now, if it weren’t for these things. Now, I understand and believe and know that we are a culmination of all of the actions and decisions and past experiences that we have lived and grown through. But I also believe that there are things that we can cognitively do and choose to take action on that helped to shape and develop us into the types of people that we either are or we want to be. And if you’re listening to this show, I can almost guarantee that you are on the road to wanting to live a more joyful life are trying to make intentional decisions that support you in pursuing your dreams and goals and your passions. And I want to give you these things in case you are looking for more intentional steps that you can take to further your progress towards living a life that you’re obsessed with. So like I mentioned, I have things for life like overall life, and then also things for business. And I’m just gonna whip right through these. And if you love any of these, feel free to write them down. Feel free to send me a message if you want to chat about them on Instagram. If you want me to chat more about them, I totally can. So taking a look at some of the things that I have done for my own life to kind of make me the kind of person that I am. And if you are new to the show or you are new to discovering me, I need you to know that like my energy My personality is big loud in your face, like glitter and a disco ball all at once. I give literally the hard truth all the time. I may be brutally honest, out of tender loving care kind of human. I go after things without even thinking it through. I tell people all the time that I literally fling myself off the cliff without having a pet ever shoot, and I like show it on the way down. Because that’s just how I am. And I’ve always been that way. But I do think that there are things that I have done to help me to get here, right. So the first thing that I have done in my life that I think has really helped me to be the confident and outgoing person that I am, and really have the self love and the self belief that I do, is getting really real with myself about my health, and my body type. And you might be thinking, why are you talking about this right now? Like you we are here for joyful living, we’re here for living our best lives to do today, like what does this have to do with that, as a woman, I feel and especially as a millennial woman, I am turning 29 and April, I feel as if our generation of females were really exposed to really detrimental marketing and messaging and comments about health and what a healthy body looks like, and what a beautiful body looks like, and what a beautiful woman looks like. And it was a really hard thing growing up, I hated the way I looked, I thought I was ugly, I thought I wasn’t lovable, I had all of these horrible, self deprecating thoughts. And it took a lot of work through high school and through college and even after college, to just get real with myself to know that like, this is the way my body looks, it just is like I have a belly, I have a big butt, I have thighs, I do not have a six pack, I never will work to have a six pack because not that I don’t think that having a six pack or being you know, a size two genius is is good or bad or whatever. It’s just not my body type. And I understand that my health based off of genetics, based off of family based off of whatever is what it is, I understand that I’m predisposed, you know, I’m predisposed to certain things. My body type is a very specific type. And I have come to love that and accept that and get on board with that. And the reason why I’m glad that I did that, and I’m glad that I did that work is because now I do things to celebrate my body, I work out to celebrate my body instead of to punish my body, I wake up every single day wearing clothing and getting dressed to flatter into into showcase my body in a really loving way. And I know that that’s something that so many women of all ages, body types, races, colors, all of the things really struggle with. And this is not an easy thing to do. And it’s a huge mind game. But it’s one that I am really glad that I have worked to play in my favor, if that makes sense. And is one that I am continuing to work on going forward. And so this decision to just be honest with myself and get real with myself has been huge and living a joyful life. Okay, the next thing that I am glad that I have done and this is a more recent decision is I’m really glad that passed me signed up for therapy when I knew that I needed it. And if you have been listening to the last couple of weeks of the show, or the last couple of months of the show, you know that I started therapy again back in June or July of 2023. So I’ve been going to therapy now for about six months. And it’s been a really positive experience. And I’m really grateful for that. Because I know that many people out there maybe you included, have not had great experiences going to therapy or trying medications. I’m one of those people, I was actually forced to go to therapy when I was very, very young. It was a really traumatic experience for me. And so going back to therapy as an adult was a really difficult thing to do. But looking back on it, I’m really glad that I took that initiative anyway, I got uncomfortable anyway, because now I am leaps and bounds beyond where I was six months ago, before starting therapy. And I said sign up for therapy when I knew I needed it because to me therapy is one of those things that you have to be in the right frame of mind to go. And you have to be ready individually on your own to heal in order for it to be beneficial. And I know this and I believe this because like I said, I have been told and forced to go when I was a minor to go to therapy and speak with a therapist when I wasn’t ready. And it didn’t do anything for me except, you know, put me through a lot of traumatic experiences that I would could have avoided if I was given the chance to like say okay, I want to go talk about this to someone. And I wasn’t given that chance. Right. So I am so glad that passed me summer of 2023 Maddie was like it’s time to go like it’s time to heal. It’s time to stop putting band aids and metaphorical like creams and ointments on this open wound and just let it heal and get help in that healing. And I’m not going to sugarcoat it like it hasn’t been an easy experience. I have had to open up a lot of past experiences and past traumas and have really difficult conversations with family and my husband and my therapist, Mary shout out to Mary, but it’s been a really great journey and One that I would go on over and over and over again. And so I just I want you to know, if you are someone who goes to therapy or is considering going to therapy, there’s nothing wrong with it, I am a high functioning anxious, girlie. And it’s okay to talk about it, it’s okay to need that kind of support. And I’m really glad that I started therapy when I did, because I was ready to and I was ready to heal, and move on and get better and grow. And the journey of of starting therapy in the first place has been amazing. And I’m so glad that I did it. So the next thing that old pass Maddie did that I future Maddie right now, Maddie is very grateful that I did is work to build up my self reliance and self assurance, and not need as much external validation as I once did. This is something that comes I think, from being the youngest, and being in a really big family. And growing up in the family structure that I did when I was younger, and even like through high school, and even a little bit into college. In order to feel confident, and successful and worthy. And all of these things. I needed a lot of external validation. Like I remember in high school, I would not leave the house, if my mom didn’t tell me, she liked my outfit, I would go and change like immediately. And I know that that sounds really silly. Like it’s just an outfit, who cares. But that mindset bleeds into so many other areas of life that you don’t even recognize until you start to do this work. And I think that it was middle of college right after graduation, where I really needed to work on this because I was diving into things that other people would never think to do. I remember I was 2120 no older than that. 2322. And I decided to start my own business, I decided to start online teaching, I decided to do all of these things that like none of my friends were doing and I had no example of people doing. And I really needed to build up my own self assurance and self resilience and reliance to be able to grow those things and do those things and, and not feel like I needed other people to say yeah, I believe in you like to thumbs up girlfriend go for it. Like it was one of those processes and growth experiences that I needed to go through. In order to know that I can rely on myself. I can depend on myself. And I don’t need anybody else to say, Yep, you’re doing a good job. That’s the right next move, for me to continue to grow and get better and progress. And the reason why I’m grateful that I did that is because now I lead multiple businesses and I pursue multiple journeys and passions and things in life that I just do. And I don’t need someone I don’t need my husband or my friends or, or my coworkers or whoever to be like, oh, yeah, that’s the right next step. Sure, those connections are great. Sure, I ask questions and get feedback. But at the end of the day, I don’t need to rely on anyone else to know that what I’m doing is the right next move. And I deeply trust in my decision making skills, because I worked on building this self belief and this self reliance, and I’m really glad that I did. Okay, the last thing that I’m really glad that I did years and years and years ago, which is something I still do now is I regularly consume positive personal development. And when I say positive personal development, I mean books and podcasts and media and Instagram and social media, all the things right. And this is something that I actually started to do when I was working and growing a network marketing business. And it’s something that I have continued to do even now after leaving my network marketing business. And it’s been something that has been truly transformative for me in my mindset. A lot of times people are like, How are you so positive? How do you have so much energy? How do you look on the bright side all the time? Well, first and foremost, that’s just kind of like a default setting. Honestly, it’s a trauma response, if I’m being honest with you, but the other half of that is it’s because I consume positive messaging and positive personal development on the weekly right, like I have podcasts that I love, I have books that I’ve reread, I have audiobooks that I listened to. And it really just plants the seed of joyful living and positive thinking and growth mindset that I would not have if I did not read those books, or listen to those podcasts or watch his YouTube videos, years and years and years ago. And it’s one of those things that it truly is that message of what you consume you become. And more often than not like we hear that when it comes to our food. But it really is like the food that we give to our brain right? What you consume, media wise, is what you become. And I’m really glad that when I was in my early 20s I consumed a lot of positive media when it came to running a business or mindset or positive living or healing or trauma or body image or whatever. Because now those messages are ingrained in my brain and I think about them often and they are always living there as like positive little cell have growth nuggets. And it’s been super super beneficial for me to start that journey and go on that journey of consuming positive personal development. So if you are someone who is new to the personal development space, and you want my recommendations send me a DM over on Instagram. I have like a little PDF of like my favorite personal development books that will send your way. Have you ever felt like the people in your life just don’t understand the dream that you have on your heart? Or even the desire that you have to be more joyful or intentional or even just plain happy? Like Life is good enough? Why do you need more? Right? Well, my friend if this is you, I have something special just for you. The Sunshine squad community is your go to place for that validation that you’re searching for, to know that you aren’t crazy for wanting more and that you aren’t alone in that desire either. This online community has grown to be filled with amazing joy seekers purpose pursuers, happy hustlers, and dream chasers just like you. In the sunshine squad community, you get continued guidance from me that you need to make your dreams a reality, a community of women who get it and the steps that you need to make your life something that you’re totally obsessed with. If you are ready to say yes to those things, you need to jump into the sunshine squad ASAP. And you can do so right now via the link in the show notes. If you do have questions on what the sunshine squad community is, or if it’s right for you, feel free to send me a DM over on Instagram. I would love to chat with you more about it over there. And my friend, I can’t wait to see you inside of the sunshine squad. Bay. So now let’s dig into the things that I’m glad that I have done in my business in the past that now me current Maddie and really grateful that I did. Okay. Now I have to say this as a caveat. This is not business advice. This is not business coaching. This is not legal advice. This is just things that I have done. In my own personal business as an entrepreneur of five plus years at this point, things that I have done, I’m really grateful that I did that if you want to explore on your own time, feel free, but this is not legal advice. I’m not telling you what to do. I am sharing one self employed girl’s life to another you feel. Okay, so the first thing that I really glad that I did, and I continue to do is I worked to make my schedule work for me, not work me. And by that I mean, I have been really intentional. And with the help of other people don’t get me wrong, this was not an individualized journey, I have people who have helped me to do this have worked to create a schedule that fits my life, and fits all the things that I want to get done in my life without burning myself out without feeling like I’m working all the time without feeling like I’m burning the candle at both ends. Now there are seasons and I am exiting season as this is being recorded, where I am hustling my butt off, and I’m working on the weekends, and I’m pulling 12 hour days because I just have to and that’s just the season I’m in right. But 99% of the time, my schedule is one that allows me to have space to go see friends for coffee, or to go work downtown at a coffee shop, or to kick out of the office on Fridays at two o’clock, whatever it might be. And I worked to make sure that my schedule worked for me, not work me. And that’s really important in the self employed space. Because so often, especially as entrepreneurs, we see those people who are working all the time being celebrated. We see those entrepreneurs who are putting in long hours and and going to all the conferences and showing up for all the speaking events being celebrated. But really, in my opinion, the thing to celebrate the most is the entrepreneur is the business owner who runs a business that supports their life. And they still have a life, right not just pays their bills and allows them to live in a big fancy house but allows them to have a life allows them to take their families on vacation and clock out and not have to work on that vacation, or to take the last week of the year off and not have to worry about checking their email, right. And so this is something that if you are a self employed person or an entrepreneur or whatever, in you currently feel like your schedule is working you it’s time to adjust. Take a look at what you what you’re doing right now what hours you want to work, and work to make your schedule fit your life, not your life that your schedule. The next thing that I did in my business years ago that I have never been afraid to do that I encourage every business owner to do if and when you can, is to hire things out that you either know that you can’t do or you don’t want to do. And perfect examples of this in my own business are my taxes. I have a CPA when I started my TPT store, which is a very small revenue stream for me but a revenue stream nonetheless I hired someone to help me open it. And I also hire out things like coaching and OBM services and something I’m creation of certain content for people. But it’s one of those things that I hire out before, sometimes I even need to. And the reason I do that is because I know that there are certain skills that I don’t know how to do, or I don’t have the time to learn. And it’s a matter of if this thing is going to get done, because I’m gonna hire it out, or it’s never gonna get done, because I have to learn how to do it first. So if you are someone in business who’s growing a business, you want to scale your business, and you have the means to hire something out, whether it’s something like your taxes, or your bookkeeping, or email management or customer service, just doing, you will find that you have way more time and capacity and probably revenue and income as well. Because you hired that thing out. And it’s not something clogging up your brain space. Don’t be afraid to hire out in your business. Because be because that fear of hiring out is actually holding you back from more growth and success that you could be having if you just hired out in the first place. Okay, the next thing that I’m glad that I did, and this goes back to my schedule, and like having a schedule that works for me, is I have a weekly routine that essentially repeats itself every single week where I have certain tasks designated to certain days. And as a business owner, my favorite thing that I’ve ever done for myself that like every year, I’m so grateful that I do is I have a weekly appointment with myself on Friday morning to do my bookkeeping, okay. And I tell entrepreneurs to do this all the time, and they roll their eyes at me like oh my god, I would hate to do that. I don’t want to have to do that. My friend, it literally takes 15 minutes or less on a Friday morning. And it saves you hours of time when it comes to tax season. Because if you don’t do this, if you don’t keep track of your expenses and your bookkeeping, you’re gonna have to do it eventually. So you could either do it in 15 minutes over the course of a year, one day a week. Or you could spend multiple days potentially right around tax season while your CPA is like begging you for all of your stuff so that you file your taxes, and you’re pulling your hair out. Literally this 15 minute bookkeeping, I literally have it called like money management on my calendar is when I sit down and I go through bookkeeping I do I use QuickBooks for my bookkeeping, it’s very simple. And I literally go through all of my expenses for my business for my personal life, my credit cards, all of these things, I look at my revenue, I look at my expenses for the week and for the month. And I just balance my checkbook. Literally, it takes me 15 minutes a week, once once once a week, and then I’m done. And I don’t think about it anymore. And I move on. And it has such it’s been such a game changer for me come tax season because literally all I need to do is share my QuickBooks with my CPA. And I’m like, there you go. It’s all done. It’s like it’s not a thing. And they’re ready to go. And my taxes get done in like a week versus like several months because I was behind and I was unorganized. And this is unfortunately one of those things that like I had to learn the hard way. But now that I’ve done it, it saves me so so so much time. So again, if you’re a business owner, and you don’t already have this, like weekly date with yourself on your calendar, put it on your calendar. Now, I promise you will thank yourself later. Okay. And finally, the last thing that I am glad that I did. And this is not something I did right away. And it’s something that I wish I would have done right away. I actually didn’t do this until the start of 22. But this is something that literally anyone who owns her own business would tell you to do is I opened up my own business bank account in my business’s name, right. And I got a business credit card as fast as humanly possible. Now that business credit card situation is kind of finicky, because at least for me, because my student loans, they took me a year for me to even be able to get a business credit card because I had to like prove income or whatever it was like its whole frickin thing. But once I got the business credit card, it was like we are using it, we are getting points, we’re using points, all the things. And I’m so glad that I did this because it makes my bookkeeping really, really easy. And it’s kind of like that separation of church and state between my personal income and my personal expenses, my business income and my business expenses. So without this getting too far down into like business advice, because that’s not what this is. Just find a CPA that you trust or talk to your CPA about the importance of doing this. And make sure that you do this in 2024 If you have not already, of course, everyone’s businesses are different. Everyone’s structure is gonna be a little bit different. But this is definitely a conversation to have with a CPA or bookkeeper or a tax accountant, whatever. But it is something that I’m glad that I did. Because now every single year, everything financially is just a little bit cleaner and a little bit less gray and hazy and smushy because we’re like intermittent mingling dollars and cents and all of those things, but this is definitely something that I would talk to a CPA about doing about getting set up and have that like conversation with them. But it’s definitely something that I have done in the past and I’m very grateful that I did because now my bookkeeping and money management, it’s just way easier. Alright, and that is everything that I have for you today. These are eight things that I have done in the past that now me is Very grateful that I’ve done because they have really helped me to thrive and live joyfully and just feel a little bit more at peace and at balance in my life both personally and business wise. If you are going to try any of these things out in your own life, feel free to send me a message over on Instagram. Let me know which one you are going to try out. And if you loved today’s episode, be sure to take a screenshot share it to your Instagram stories and tag me at living the letter N sunshine so I can see your biggest takeaways and why you loved it. Until next time, I dudes, I am sending you all the sunshine good vibes, and I hope you make it a great day. Girlfriend. Thank you so much for listening to today’s new episode. If you loved it, please send it to a friend share it on Instagram and tag me so I can see and consider leaving the show a rating or a review. Ratings and reviews are kind of like sharing or liking a post on Instagram and they really help the show grow and reach new women just like you. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a new episode. And until next week, I am sending you all the sunshine, good vibes and I hope you make it a great day.