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This is a public service announcement that literally no one in the world is the best at everything all the time. And if that doesn’t feel true to you, I am pulling the curtain back on some things that I’m really bad at (that I’m also okay being bad at!).
It’s okay to *not* be the best at everything all the time. Your perfectionist heart may be uncomfortable with this, but learning to be okay with having faults is a part of life. I hope that by sharing my faults, you feel less alone in your own.
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EPISODE TRANSCRIPT:
Maddy, hey, bestie, and welcome to the living in sunshine podcast. I’m your host, Maddy fry and around here, we are all about encouraging, inspiring and giving you the tough love that you need to hear to get out there and live as your best self. Each and every Wednesday, you can expect to learn tangible tips to help you find your bigger purpose, be given simple action steps that you can take in order to make progress toward your biggest dreams, and hear how you can purposely pursue joy on the daily so sit down, grab your favorite drink and let’s have a girl chat. This is the living in sunshine podcast. Good morning. Good morning, my friend. And welcome back to the living in sunshine podcast. I am so excited that you are back tuning in for a brand new episode. In case this is your first episode that you’re listening to. My name is Maddy Frye and I am your host and guide for all things joyful living. I put out a new podcast episode every other week. So for the month of October, we will have three episodes, which is very exciting, and for today’s episode, I thought it would be just a little refreshing reminder that the people that you follow online do not always have it all together, and it might seem like they do, but really they don’t like if We are going to pull back the curtain, um, on the reality of social media and just the reality of being human, there are things that we are all really bad at, and I’m just going to expose myself for the sake of argument and for the EXA the sake of being an example, and share with you four things that I’m really bad at that. I’m okay being really bad at okay, because it’s okay to not be the best at everything, and it’s okay to recognize that, like, you have your faults, and you know you can work on them, and you can want to work on them, but like, also recognizing that, like there are just some some things that you’re just always not going to be the best at, and that’s okay to just make peace with that, and I feel like I try to keep things really real and really honest on Instagram about how my life is going and how, just generally, things are in my personal being existence. But just in case you don’t follow me on Instagram or you’re catching this episode a couple months after, I just wanted to, like, be real and honest and share the things that, like I’m really bad at that, like I’m okay being really bad at Okay. So first and foremost, this is, like, not a big thing for other people, but it is a big thing for me, because my, like, mental health, is really rooted in this, and I just feel like I feel so much better when I am really focused on this. So this thing that I’m alluding to is keeping my house clean. Okay, for some people, keeping their house clean is, like, a necessity. I grew up and I had my best friend growing up, her mom was, like, very adamant about having a clean house. And I don’t just mean tidy. I mean clean like sparkling counters, nothing on the floor, the hardwood floors had to be vacuumed every day. And I have friends like that still today who like vacuum their house every day. And I’m like, I vacuum my house maybe once every three weeks. If you consider the number of animals that I have in my house, and if you’re like, that’s disgusting, I know, I know it’s okay. I understand get it. But like, keeping my house clean is just not my one like, number one priority every day. Like, it probably should be, like we we keep the sink clean of dishes as best as we can. I vacuum like I said, every, like, once every one to two weeks. But I’m not gonna lie, my carpets could be vacuumed and then vacuumed again, and then vacuumed a third time, and still need to be vacuumed again, and it’s just one of those things that like on the weekends, right? I work all week. Lucas works all week, and then the weekends come and we live in Charleston, and it’s like, let’s go to the beach, or let’s go play pickleball, or let’s go downtown, or let’s go for a walk, or let’s go to a concert, like, let’s go do something. And the internal self control to stay home and clean my house is non existent. And so you know what happens? The weekend happens, and then it’s Monday again, it’s another week, and then it gets to the point where it’s just like, I can’t stand it. And thankfully, like Lucas and I are only two people. We don’t have kids like dropping their stuff everywhere or making messes like kids do. That’s not a slight. That’s a fact. I was a kid at one point, and I made messes everywhere, um, and so that helps, but, like, there’s definitely things, like, I have flowers right now downstairs by my front door that are, like, dead and need to be thrown away. And I will walk by them five more times before I actually throw them away. You know what I mean? So thing number one that I’m just bad at that. Like, I know I could be. Better at is definitely keeping my house a little bit cleaner. Better things to do than clean my house. I’m not gonna lie. Okay, thing number two, that is very superficial. As I reread my notes, like, this is a very superficial thing. But, like, it really it is. But like, it’s a common thing nowadays to, like, you know, be up on but another thing that I’m really bad at is, like, keeping up with, like, the latest trends or fashion or, like, pop culture things I don’t have time. And honestly, I don’t care. I don’t I don’t care that, like, it’s out of fashion to wear skinny jeans. And I don’t care that, like, low rise socks are no longer cool and like, we’re supposed to be wearing ankle sock like I don’t I genuinely, I don’t care. It bothers me very little that you can see my underwear lines through my leggings, because I don’t like to wear thongs and have a wedgie all day, every day, while I wear leggings, I don’t care. It doesn’t bother me. Like, don’t look at my butt if you don’t want to know that I have underwear lines. Like, keeping up with keeping up with the Joneses as a general term, is just exhausting. I don’t have time. I have better things to do. I would much rather spend my mental and creative energy somewhere more productive than, like, knowing what Taylor and Travis are up to, or knowing the latest Tiktok drama, or, like, understanding the latest thing that I should be buying when I go to buy myself new clothes, like I don’t care. And I think that this is very true, and like a very reoccurring thing that we hear as like you get older, you stop caring. It could not be that that is so, so so true, like, literally, I don’t care. I don’t have time. I don’t care. I have a million things to do, um, cleaning my house is one of them. I’m going to continue to ignore that, though, and I don’t. I don’t have time to watch, like, a 15 minute tick tock about some stupid influencer that doesn’t matter to my life. And just it makes no sense to me. And again, if you are someone who, like, likes to keep up with these things or whatever, you’re opposite of me and like these are, like, part of your identity, that’s fine. Go off. Girl, I don’t care. Um, these are just things that I am bad at. And I understand that like this one is very superficial, right? Very, very, very superficial. But in 2024 where social media is king and and it means something to understand what’s going on, or someone’s like, oh, did you see this on Tiktok? No, I did not see that on Tiktok. I No, I did not Tiktok. What I’m not I wouldn’t know. I would not know. All right. Thing number three, that I am really bad at that I’m okay with being really bad at is saying no to things that get me excited. This goes back to point number one. This is why I never cleaned my house, because exciting opportunities come up, and I say yes, and then I’m never home, but saying no to things that get me excited. And this is something that we’ve talked about before. It’s like that shiny object syndrome, that squirrel syndrome, where it’s like, oh, I want to do this, and then I want to do this, and then I want to do that. I follow that train of thought of like not getting distracted by the shiny things. But the caveat to that is that there is a time and a place for for all of these things, for saying yes and saying no, and right now I’m in a spot, personally, schedule wise, financially, where I don’t have to say no to every shiny opportunity that comes up to me in my life. I don’t have kids, I work for myself, and that leaves a lot of time for me to do things that really excite me. It is not uncommon for me to get a text message from someone that says, hey, I’m going to be in New York for a week in June. Do you want to come stay with me? Hell yes, I want to come stay with you. I’m gone. I’m on that plane. I had a friend send me a message a couple weeks ago, and she said, Hey, do you want to go do a girls weekend over Labor Day weekend and hang out for the weekend in a cabin like in Georgia, and I said, Fuck yeah, I do. Absolutely I do. And for some people, that’s not totally doable, and I honor that, and I respect that, but I struggle sometimes with saying no to things that get me excited, which then sometimes does lead to being behind on work, or having to come home and work in the evenings, when I really try not to do that, or feeling a little bit overwhelmed or stressed, right? Like everything has a consequence, positive or negative, and when we recognize the things that we are quote, unquote, not good at, we have to understand that when we’re not good at those things, aka holding boundaries and saying no and staying home to get our work done, there’s going to be consequences to that right,
anytime I say yes to a trip, I am suffering the consequence of having less money, because I obviously have to pay for that trip. And so it’s just one of those things where there is a time and a place for self control, and, you know, saying no intentionally, and there are other times where you can. Continue to say yes to things that excite you, but when you do that, you have to understand that you are losing something in return, whether you see it or not. That might be time, that might be money, that might be relationships, that might be social time, that might be work time, it could be literally anything. So this is one of those things that like in this current season, I’m okay with not saying no to things, because I’ve gotten some really amazing opportunities presented to me because I have said yes, and I’m okay with that. So it’s one of those things where it’s like, right now I’m okay with this. Maybe in 1020, years, I’ll be like a burnt piece of toast and just completely fried from always saying yes. But for now, I’m going to just enjoy the opportunities that are coming my way, because I’m really terrible at saying no to things that get me excited. And finally, the last thing that I am bad at, that I am okay with being bad at, is living online versus offline. So if you have been part of the living in Sunshine Community for long enough, you know that I used to be on stories all the time, like all the time, every morning I’d wake up, I’d do like a good morning story. I used to post my workouts and what I ate and what I was reading and what I was working all the time, right? Used to be on stories, and I used to feel, actually, honestly, really anxious if I didn’t get online, if I didn’t get on my stories, especially Instagram stories, I would get so anxious and uncomfortable. And it had to be one of those things that, like, I had to break up with that, and now I’m the complete opposite, where I am like maybe on my stories once a week, and that’s okay, because that anxiety of not being present, of not being on, is no longer something I’m struggling with, and no longer something that I am facing when I Have a really busy day, and I just don’t have the five minutes to hop on stories, because I’m back to back to back to back client work. I have meetings or errands or appointments or whatever it might be that I have to be at where I can’t be on my stories. It’s one of those things now where posting, like just getting up a feed post is enough, because that’s all I can really handle. And it’s been this big shift, I would say, within the last year, of like, how frequently I am on Instagram at all, because things have changed, new opportunities have arisen, and and I need to focus on those. And it’s been this positive release of something I used to really enjoy because, like, I did enjoy being on Instagram stories. I loved that way of connecting with people. I still love that way of connecting with people, but it’s definitely one of those things now where I’m like, Okay, I still need to show up in some capacity. So I just need to be okay with, like, what is my best? So, yeah, those are my those are my four things that, like, I’m pretty bad at right now that I’m okay with being bad at. Because, in retrospect, all of these things help me protect my peace in some way, or they help me to welcome in more joy into my life in some way. Or they allow me to do things that light me up or create space for me to grow and learn and challenge my brain, which my brain needs, in ways that I wouldn’t be able to do if I was, like, really great at all of these things, right? So if you have something that you are like, not super, super duper at, like, I want you to find peace in knowing that that’s okay. Everyone has their vices, everyone has their Achilles heel, and whatever yours are that’s totally fine and totally normal, but and I want you to, I want to encourage you to really think about, you know, what am I getting? Because this isn’t a strength of mine. Do I have someone in my life who this is a strength of theirs, and they helped me do this, and now we have that thing that we can connect over. Do you have more time or more opportunities, or more exciting new things happening because of this, quote, unquote, fault of yours? Right? Everything, in my opinion, if we look hard enough, there is a silver lining in there, and we can see and grow in new ways because of the things that we’re maybe not so great at. So that is everything I have for you this week, my friends. If you loved today’s brand new episode, feel free to take a screenshot, post it to Instagram and tag me. I love you all so much, and I will see you again in another few weeks. And until then, I am sending you all the sunshine, good vibes, and I hope you make it a great day, girlfriend. Thank you so much for listening to today’s new episode. If you loved it, please send it to a friend, share it on Instagram and tag me so I can see and consider leaving the show a rating or a review. Ratings and reviews are kind of like sharing or liking a post on Instagram, and they really help. The show grow and reach new women just like you. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a new episode, and until next week, I am sending you all the sunshine, good vibes, and I hope you make it a great day. You.