EPISODE 129: [HYPE GIRL CHAT] The Most Common Mindset Blocks & How to Get Over Them




Over the last few years of working with women through my online community & one-on-one coaching clients, I have heard *alot* of mindset blocks that are holding women back from living a life they’re obsessed with. In today’s new episode, I am breaking down the three most common ones I hear from women and how to get around them. 


This episode is perfect for you if you are dealing with a mindset block that is holding you back from living a life you love! Be sure to tune in now & share your biggest takeaways on Instagram! 



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Maddy 0:01 Hey, bestie, and welcome to the living in sunshine podcast. I’m your host, Maddy fry. And around here we are all about encouraging, inspiring, and giving you the tough love that you need to hear to get out there and live as your best self. Each and every Wednesday, you can expect to learn tangible tips to help you find your bigger purpose. be given simple action steps that you can take in order to make progress toward your biggest dreams. And hear how you can purposely pursue joy on the daily. So sit down, grab your favorite drink. And let’s have a girl chat. This is the living in sunshine podcast. Good Morning, my friends. And welcome back to the living in sunshine podcast. I hope that you are ready for some hype, some encouragement, some inspiration, a swift kick in the ass because today we are doing I approach chat. And I’m so excited that you are here whether you are ready for all of these things or not. I just want you to know how grateful and thankful I am for you for showing up and hitting play and listening to this episode or listening to any episode you’ve listened to ever of the living in sunshine podcast because I am here in my mission of being here is to give you encouragement and give you hope and share my behind the scenes crazy life or, or to teach you how to set boundaries or whatever it might be. So that way you can go out there and you can purposely pursue Joy each and every day. And so that way you can design and live a life that you’re obsessed with. Right? That is the whole purpose, the whole intention of this podcast. And every single time you tune in, you give me the opportunity to do that. But you also give yourself the opportunity to live that. Okay, so let’s go ahead without further ado, let’s go ahead and dive into today’s hype girl chat, which are the most common mindset blocks that I hear from women that I work with both in my community, the sunshine squad membership, and within my one on one coaching clients within what I call a clarity call. And if you are curious about either of those, my online community or my Clarity Calls, they are both going to be linked down below in the show notes. You can also find more info on them over on my website living in sunshine.com. But without further ado, let’s break down some of these most common mindset blocks that women are facing and how to get over them. Okay, so the first mindset block the one of the most common mindset blocks I hear from women, is this, okay? And it is my dream or vision for my life is so big, that it feels like it’s never going to happen, right? Raise your hand, if you’ve ever had a dream, or you’ve had something that you’ve wanted to do. And you’re like, that’ll never happen. For me. It’s just too big. It’s not possible. It’s too hard to get. It’s too unattainable. It’s too far out of reach. It’s too whatever, right? I know that I had been here before. And I hope that I can always be an example of someone who had a really big dream, who managed to get there without completely losing her mind, right. And the way that we get around this mindset block is we actively practice the skill of reverse engineering. And I’ve talked about reverse engineering before on this show. But just quickly, when we reverse engineer, essentially what we do is we take our bigger vision that we have for our life, and we take that big goal is that big dream. And we break it down into smaller steps that we can attain ABLIS work towards making and actively take as an active participant in our life in order to make that dream happen. Okay. So if you are dealing with the mindset block of my dream, or my vision, or that goal is way too big, it’s never going to happen, then the thing that you can do to help work through that roadblock to to get around that mindset block is to reverse engineer. How can you break down that goal or that vision into smaller, attainable, actionable steps? Right. Instead of focusing on the top of the mountain? What smaller handholds or steps can you take in order to get to the top of that mountain, right? It’s that whole staircase metaphor, where your goal is at the top of like a staircase that has like 50 million steps to it. You need to focus on one step at a time. And try your very hardest not to get so tunnel visioned on the end goal, and instead get tunnel vision and focus in on the next step that you can take to get to that big goal. So if your current mindset block is that your dream is too big, it’s never going to happen. It’s because you are focusing only on that big goal at the end of the at the top of the stairs, right which isn’t a bad thing. But what happens is we become so overwhelmed because instead of looking at the one step in front of us that we can be taking, we’re trying to take in the entire staircase and that can be really overwhelming and really stressful. So instead of looking all the way to the top of your metaphorical staircase if you’re following my train of thought, I want you to look down and focus on the one step in front of you, one step in front of you just take one step in front of the other, and you will be well on your way to making that goal happen. Okay? So that is what you’re going to do. If your dream feels too big, and like, it’s never gonna happen, the way you’re gonna get around that, what is it again? That’s right, reverse engineering, focusing on one step at a time. Very good. The next mindset block that I hear quite frequently, both online and within my one on one coaching clients who have a clarity call with me is this, okay? They usually say it usually comes out as the people in my life don’t believe in my goal, slash they don’t understand what I’m working towards. So I feel like it’s not worth working towards, it’s not worth it. The people in my life don’t get it. The people in my life, don’t believe in me, the people in my life don’t think it’s possible, so it’s not worth it. Okay? Woof. This is not an easy one to unpack, this is not an easy one to work around. Because the truth of the matter is, is we want to feel accepted, we want to feel appreciated, we want to feel believed in. And when the people in our lives, our spouses, our families, our friends, our co workers, whoever, when they don’t believe in the dreams that we have for ourselves, it can feel really difficult to continue to work towards it. Because we don’t want to be outcasted we don’t want to be ostracized, we don’t want to be seen as this weirdo or this freak, or this overachiever or this, whatever we’re they’re calling us, because we’re working towards this thing. But in order to, to work with this mindset block to work around this mindset block to get through it, is to remind yourself of whose life you’re living. Are you living their life? Or are you living your life? And if we really unpack this further, is it that they don’t believe in you? Or is it that they’re reflecting their own insecurities, their own limiting beliefs on their own lives on to you to then bring you down a peg to be on their level of someone who doesn’t believe in themselves, right? I know how difficult it can be to pursue a dream, or to work towards a goal that the people in your life don’t get. I’ve been there, I’ve done that. I have lived that so many times. It’s exhausting. And it can feel really isolating. But in those moments where someone is telling you that your dream is stupid, or a waste of time, or a waste of money, or it’s never going to happen because of how you grew up, or your current financial situation or whatever, I want you to remind yourself of those two things. Am I living my life? Or am I living their life? And are their words genuinely authentically about me? Or are they deflecting their own insecurities on me to bring me down to their level of lack of self belief? Because more often than not, it’s not about you. It’s about them. I have had people in my life say, Oh, what is Maddie doing what it how’s that cute little business of pursuing, that has nothing to do with me, that has everything to do with them, right? So often the words, especially the nasty or the harmful, or the negative words that we hear from other people have so little to do with us, and so much to do with the person saying them. So if you have people who are filling you with a lack of belief, I want you to really unpack that and think about where are those words are stemming from. And I also want you to remember that there are people out there who will believe in you, me being one of them, the sunshine squad community being one of them. I created the sunshine squad community, which is my online community for women, for women, for women like you, for dreamers like you who don’t have that in real life support and encouragement and inspiration to pursue really big goals that make you want to crop your pants, you come into this community and it’s full of women who are doing it, who are living it, who are dreaming, and who are encouraging other women to dream as well. So if you feel that lack of belief from the people in your life, it’s time for you to find new people, it’s time for you to get in a space to get in the room with other women who want to see when and the sunshine squat is that room, I can promise you that. And finally, the most common mindset block that I hear from women is this. They usually say I feel stuck in what to do next, because there’s so much to do. Okay. And this is something that I hear a lot from women who are working multiple jobs, who have children who have a big dream, but they’re not sure how to make it happen, who have been working towards hitting the next milestone or the next goal or the next achievement in their life. And they just feel stuck their days feel like they are in that movie Groundhog Day where it’s like the same day over and over and over and over and they’re just living life on Repeat How can we work through this? Right? How can we get past this idea that I feel stuck, and I’m stuck because there’s so much to do. My friend, the key to this is clarity on priority. And by that, I mean, if you feel like there is so much to do, it is because you aren’t clear on what actually matters to you. So easily in life, we start to take on new things that we need to do, okay, I’m gonna start to do this, I also need to do that this person needs me to do this, my child expects me to do this, I need to do this to be a better wife, this blah, blah, blah, right? We have all these things that over time, whether we recognize it or not, we are adding to our plates, we are adding to our to do lists. And then suddenly, there is so much to do, because everything is important to us. But the truth of the matter is, not everything can be important to us. Not everything can have the same level of priority to us. Of everything else on our list, we cannot prioritize all of the things that we want to do or should do or need to do. They all can’t be on the same level of prioritization, it’s just not possible, nothing will get done, if you aren’t clear on what is a higher priority than something else. And so if you are feeling stuck, I want you to ask yourself, what are my priorities? What are my top three most important things that I need to do or want to do? And all of this big muck of a mess of stuff on my to do list on my plate that I need to get done? What are the top three priorities that I absolutely, positively need to get done? Or want to get done? And you need to gain clarity on what is a priority in your life in this season, because seasons change and taking in your current season into consideration is important, right? You can’t ignore the current season of life you’re in when it comes to your priorities because your priorities change. And so if you are in this mindset block of feeling stuck, because there’s so much to do, it’s more than likely because you aren’t prioritizing appropriately. So how do you figure out what to prioritize, you need to ask yourself, which of these things is going to proactively get me to the goal that I’m wanting to achieve? Right? Whatever that is, for whatever part of your life it is, which of these things is going to bring me the most joy? What’s gonna make me happy, right? If if this random thing on your to do list, maybe it’s starting an email list, or writing weekly emails, isn’t going to bring you joy, don’t make it a priority, don’t have it be at the top of your priority list, right? If that’s not something that’s gonna bring you joy in your business, don’t do it. Okay. And I know, there are evil marketers who are listening to this podcast, who are like, Oh, my God, she’s giving terrible advice. I don’t care. I am a big believer in doing things that bring us joy, because the more joy that we feel, the better that we can serve and thrive in our own lives. So there’s something on your to do list that doesn’t bring you joy, don’t do it. Don’t make it a priority. It’s okay to say not yet. And not right now. Because it’s not the right season. And so again, you need to go back, you need to look at all of the stuff that you’re trying to get done, or all of the things on your to do list, and you need to prioritize those things, pick out the top three things that matter the most to you. And focus on that, right, focus on those three things, make it five things maximum, if you have to have a couple more, three to five things maximum focus on those, make those your priority, and I promise you, you won’t feel stuck, because you’re not going to be trying to balance all of the things and keep everything on the same pedestal when they don’t all belong on the same pedestal in the first place, my friend we are heading in to the last four weeks of the year. And the last thing that I want for you is to continue to feel stuck or overwhelmed or like your dreams aren’t going to happen. And so my hope is that you can take this podcast, you can take these action steps that we just unpacked and put them into action, implement them within your own life, and start to get past these mindset blocks that you’re currently facing. And if you are someone who is currently working through a different mindset block, whether it’s within your business, or life or whatever it might be, then you should book a clarity call because that’s exactly what Clarity Calls are for. They are to help and to support you to get past the mindset blocks, you’re having the mental blocks that you’re going through whatever it might be. And that’s the whole point you and I are going to sit down we’re going to talk about it we’re going to flesh it out. And I’m going to give you some action steps, some homework really, that you can do in order to take action to live a life that you love and to purposely pursue joy every single day to book a clarity call. I will link it down below in the show notes and if you have any questions on what a clarity call is, or you want to chat more to see if it’s a good fit For you, feel free to send me a message over on Instagram. My handle is at living the letter N sunshine. And I would love to chat with you about a clarity call and whether or not it’s a good fit for you. Until next week, my friends, I am sending you all the sunshine, good vibes, and I hope you make it a great day. Girlfriend. Thank you so much for listening to today’s new episode. If you loved it, please send it to a friend share it on Instagram and tag me so I can see and consider leaving the show a rating or a review. Ratings and reviews are kind of like sharing or liking a post on Instagram and they really help the show grow and reach new women just like you. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a new episode. And until next week, I am sending you all the sunshine, good vibes and I hope you make it a great day.