EPISODE 148: [EDUCATION] How to Celebrate Yourself More Often (even if it makes you cringe)



Audio disclaimer: My mic was not the source of choice for today’s episode which means the audio is slightly lower quality than normal! So sorry for this hiccup – we will be back with solid audio next month! 

In today’s new episode, we are digging into simple ways you can start to celebrate yourself more often! Celebration breeds motivation and is a crucial part of staying on track with your biggest goals and aspirations. If doing so makes you feel super cringy though, this episode is for you! Be sure to listen in to learn some of my favorite (and simple) ways to celebrate yourself more often! 



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Maddy 0:03 Hey bestie and welcome to the living in sunshine podcast. I’m your host, Maddy Fry and around here we are all about encouraging, inspiring, and giving you the tough love that you need to hear to get out there and live as your best self. Each and every Wednesday, you can expect to learn tangible tips to help you find your bigger purpose, be given simple action steps that you can take in order to make progress toward your biggest dreams, and hear how you can purposely pursue joy on the daily. So sit down, grab your favorite drink, and let’s have a girl chat. This is the living in sunshine podcast. Good morning, good morning my beautiful Angel and welcome to the living in sunshine podcast. I am so glad, hyped, pumped, all the things that you are here today. I’m not gonna lie to preface this episode I am jacked on caffeine right now, I got a double espresso from Starbucks and my head hurts. I feel like I’m vibrating and my words are coming out faster than my brain can keep up. So let’s just all metaphorically buckle up for a rollercoaster ride, this episode is going to be so fire because I am giving you easy ways to celebrate yourself more often. Even if it makes you cringe. Like even if the thought of celebrating yourself makes you want to poop your pants like Oh, who does that? ew. like. So self centered, so selfish, so full of herself did it it it it it, uh, we’re here to eliminate those limiting beliefs. We’re here to talk through how we can celebrate ourselves more often. But also why celebration is really frickin important. But before we get in there, I need you right now if you’re not already part of it, to consider joining the sunshine squad because in that space, if celebration is something that you really struggle with, we have small supports to encourage and inspire you to celebrate yourself every single week. Each and every Friday, we have a wins in celebration post, which always lights up on Friday afternoon. By the end of the day, there’s always like 20 or 30 comments on there of people just celebrating all of the things big small purple, green, yellow, you know, magenta, all the different shapes and forms and fashions that celebrations can come in. You see that on Friday, and it gives you space to show up and share your wins your celebrations, the things that are going well in your life with other people who want to see you win. So if celebration and celebrating yourself more often, and really just taking time to recognize and reflect all of the bad Asri that you are putting into this year. If that is something that you want to strive to get better at doing, you need to join the sunshine squad, it is linked down in the show notes. It’s also always linked over on Instagram, and join that space because in that community celebration is ingrained and embedded and just worked into that space. So naturally to where it won’t feel icky, it won’t feel cringe, it won’t feel gross to participate in celebrating yourself, right. And not only do you get the warm and fuzzies of celebrating yourself, but also the amazing feeling that comes with celebrating other people, I think the best way that we can work to celebrate ourselves more often is to celebrate others louder and more predominantly than we already are. It’s cool to tell someone that you’re proud of them. It’s amazing. And it feels really good to tell somebody else that you are in awe of them. And we do that weekly within the sunshine squad. So if you are not yet part of the online community, I cannot encourage you to go join that enough. Like I said it is linked down below it is also linked over in my bio, feel free to go check it out. And if you’ve any questions about the sunshine squad at all, please send me a message let’s chat about it. Make sure it’s the best fit for you. And for all my babes who are balling on a budget, the annual membership does save you about $40. So if you want to save a little bit of money, consider joining the annual level and I will see you inside. Okay, so let’s dig in to four easy ways that you can start to celebrate yourself more often. But before we talk about how to celebrate we need to talk about why we need to celebrate. And this is something that I actually teach about in the six weeks to you accelerator. The doors to that cohort are opening up in July so stay tuned for that you can find the waitlist down below in the show notes. But the reason we need to celebrate ourselves and when I say celebrate I don’t just mean like the big things. I mean the small things I mean, doing your journaling practice five days in a row. I mean going for a hot girl walk this summer for you know the entire month of June. I mean showing up for your business in a way that feels in alignment and and true to who you are. I don’t just mean celebrating, getting a promotion or a raise at work. I don’t just mean celebrating when you pay off. It does $1,000 worth of student loan debt. I mean, celebrate all of the things because celebrating and celebration breeds motivation, right. So if you are someone who struggled with staying motivated, if you are someone who struggles with staying on the path to get to where you want to go, part of that might be because you’re not celebrating yourself when you should be right. But for some of us self recognition, this is for all of my people, pleasers, all of my overthink errors, all of my wallflowers all of my helpers and providers and fixers, this is really hard to do. And I can say that, because I am that I grew up in a household where you were told to speak when spoken to, and to not share and to keep your emotions to yourself and just suck it up and get over it. And that’s just how I was raised right. Like that was just my upbringing. But as an adult, celebrating myself and being like, I did this thing I’m so freaking amazed and pumped and excited about it is really hard. And it was really hard for a really long time. But once I discovered that celebration breeds motivation, girl, I celebrate the shit out of myself every single week. Now, I’m like, I did this, I am the best. I’m the greatest at my job. Everyone needs to pay me a lot of money. Here I am manifesting my biggest dreams all the time. And people asked me, How do you stay motivated? Like, what do you do to stay on the path? Like you’ve been chasing this dream for years? What do you do to not give up? And my answer is I celebrate every single step of the way. Every small or or, or big leap that I make to get closer to my dreams. I’m like, celebrate, let’s go get coffee, or let’s paint my nails or let’s go for a walk or let’s tell somebody about it or any of these things, right? I celebrate that because the more we celebrate, the more we motivate, right? Just think about it in a different context. Let’s say you’re playing a sport, right? It’s pretty basic, generic example, if you are playing a sport, and your coach is just constantly telling you, you’re bad, you suck. Why are you here? You’re never gonna, you know, win the game. You’re not a team player, like just continuing to just bog you down and like being negative, are you going to continue to want to be motivated to get better? No, literally no. And it’s the same thing with your goals, your dreams, your aspirations, wherever you want to go. If you are constantly focusing on what’s not happening, or how long things are taking, or the setbacks that you’re facing, instead of changing your point of view, changing your line of focus onto the things that are happening, that are getting better, where you are growing and learning new things, you’re never going to make it right, you’re never going to make it because you’re going to lose motivation. So we must celebrate in order to then motivate ourselves to keep going because the truth of the matter is anything that you’re working towards a goal, a dream, a milestone, whatever, it’s going to take longer than you initially thought it’s going to take in order for that thing to finally come into fruition, right? I love to use the example of moving to Charleston, a personal example moving to Charleston, I put that on my vision board years ago, like way back when my husband and I first moved to New Jersey in 2018. It was on my vision board, a little white house with a yellow front door. And cute little Charleston, South Carolina. And my sweet angel of a listener. That goal that that that vision board goal dream did not come true until 2023. Four years, it took me to make that happen. But I never let it go. Why? Because I continue to celebrate the small wins the small achievements that I did in order to get to that spot, right. So now that you know why we need to celebrate, let’s talk about how we can celebrate ourselves more often. If we are the kind of person who like that just feels really uncomfortable and like really makes you want to cringe. Okay, so the first way that you are going to work to celebrate yourself more often is to start small, with acknowledging yourself in your gratitude practice, right? If you are a listener of the show, you have listened to like five or more episodes, you know that I have a massive heart on for a gratitude practice and that gratitude is a daily practice for me and it’s something that I truly believe everyone needs to be practicing. And so when you sit down to practice gratitude, and if you’re like, I don’t know how to do practice, I don’t really know how to do that. Go search the show. There are tons of episodes on gratitude sent me a message on Instagram. I will teach you in a voice memo. Start to acknowledge yourself in that gratitude practice, right. Let’s say that you got a massive project done for a client yesterday, right? Today as you practice gratitude, you can say Celebrate yourself in a very small way that doesn’t feel too self centered or, or or, you know, fooling yourself by just writing like, I’m grateful for completing that project, right? So small, doesn’t have to be a big thing. But over time, the more you do that, it’s kind of like you’re warming up your brain and your body and your mindset to know that it’s okay to recognize your hard work. And it’s okay to say, I did that. And I am worth celebrating in this small, private, intimate way of writing that I am grateful for doing that thing or completing that project or hitting that milestone. This is such a low stakes way to celebrate yourself, that is still also wildly intentional. When you practice gratitude for yourself. And you infuse celebration into that gratitude. It’s a small nod to yourself to say, you’re such a freakin badass, and I love you. And I’m so grateful that you got that done. Like pat on the back. Let’s go to the next thing, right, like you did that let’s reflect let’s let’s you know, celebrate that. And then we’re gonna move on to the next thing. So one small thing that you can start to do if you want to celebrate yourself more often, is to write your celebrations in the form of gratitude, right? I’m grateful that I showed up, I did the work. And I did that thing, because now it’s done. And I’ve accomplished it. And I’m so excited that I did that thing at number two, that you can do it to work to celebrate yourself more often. It’s something that I’ve talked about before on the show. And I’ve definitely talked about it before in the sunshine squad. And that is to make a running list of things that you have done, and keep it somewhere to reference back to when you’re having a low day or a day where you’re just like I’ve done nothing with my life, what is my purpose? What am I doing? Am I just floating through space? No, you’re actually doing the thing, which is amazing. So this list can include anything you want to include. I personally keep my list in Asana, which is an online organizational tool. I have lots of episodes where I talk about Asana. But I actually make my list. It’s an annual list. So I make it at the start of the year, right in January. And it’s saved in a safe space in my Asana setup. And every time I do something cool, I write it down, and I put it in that list. And now I started doing this like midway through 2022. But now I have a year and a half, almost two years worth of like really freaking cool things that I’ve done, right? And if you’re wondering, like what do you put in there, you can put whatever you want anything that you would want to celebrate, right. So for me, it’s generally like talks that I’ve done or podcast episodes I’ve been on or, or revenue or income goals, I’ve hit things my husband and I have done, I have things in there, like trying something new or going to this dance class or whatever, right? Like this list can really include anything that you’re proud of doing or something that scared you but you did it anyway or, or big milestones that you hit within work or your business or whatever it can be whatever you want it to be. The point is, you are collecting these little moments of celebration, and you’re putting them away for safekeeping. That way on the days where you feel like you’re just like a slug sitting on your couch doing absolutely nothing, or those days where you’re like burning onto the ground. I hate this, I hate everything. I’m gonna go back and like do the normal people thing and like, go get a normal person job. And those days where we all have them. And we’re just like, I’m a terrible human. I’m contributing nothing, right? On those days, you can go to this list, and you can say, why don’t I’m actually doing stuff. Like, I have actually shown up and done the thing. And I’m really cool. Like, I’m a coolest person I know. That’s what this list is. This list is your I’m the coolest person I know list. That’s what we’re calling it, hear it out. I’m the coolest person I know lists, where you just put things that like you have done that if you saw someone else doing them, you’d be like, Oh my god, that is so cool. Like, that is so cool. And that’s how you can treat this list. It can be a list, I’m literally making this up. Like the more I talk about this, the more it like becomes more clear in my brain. If you struggle with what to put on this list, anything that you do that if your best friend were to do, or you saw someone on the internet doing it and you would think oh my god, that’s so cool. Put that on your list. Okay, put it on your list. If you struggle with celebrating yourself, start to work to trick your brain and be like, Oh, I’m not celebrating me. I’m celebrating this random girl who I follow on Instagram, because I would celebrate her in real life if she were standing right in front of me. Use that little mindset hack to like be better about celebrating yourself. But make your honor the coolest person I know list and continue to add to it year after year and just start over so that way you have this space where you can go and you can be like I’ve done that thing. That’s so freakin cool. I love that. Another easy way to celebrate yourself more often. All right, this next one is for all of my Visual humans all of my kinetic humans, right? You know, you’re a visual learner kinetic learner auditory learner one another. This is for my kinetic and my visual learners, okay, you are going to make a celebration jar. I have talked about this before back over on Instagram a couple of years ago at this point, but I still have mine and I still use it. A celebration jar is essentially just a little jar, it can be like a soup can that you’ve cleaned out or glass jar that you clean out, whatever, it doesn’t need to be anything fancy, right? It’s just like a container. And what you do is you take a piece of paper, and you write out like 10 to 15 ways that you could celebrate when you achieve something, right. And these ways could be like painting your nails or getting my hair done or buying a new workout outfit or going for a walk or calling my friend or, you know, taking a half day could be anything paid or unpaid. Just things that are going to motivate you right things that you enjoy doing things that you want to do, you’re going to write those down on your piece of paper. And then you’re going to cut those things up into like smaller pieces. So like, you could cut your piece of paper up and then write them down. Or you could like make yourself a table, cut it out. If you’re following my train of thought. Regardless, you’re going to take those things, you’re going to fold them up, you’re going to put them in a jar, and then you are going to decide how often you pull from your celebration jar. So when I use my celebration jar, what I like to do is I like to pull something out of my jar, for every third thing that I accomplish. So let’s say some things that I want to accomplish our booking podcast guests going to the gym five or six days a week. And I don’t know checking into the sunshine squad. These are just random examples, checking into the sunshine squad every single day of the week, right. So after I do those three things I celebrate, right, and I pull something out of the door, and then I do it. And the thing with the celebration jar is you can match what you put in your jar based on the goal that you’re working towards. So let’s say you are working towards a, a weight goal, right, you’re on health and health and fitness journey, and you want to hit a certain weight up or down, whatever it is. And you tell yourself, for every X number of pounds gained or lost, I will pull out of my celebration jar, right. So you have your kind of measurement for when you’re gonna pull. And now the thing that you can do to really make this in alignment with your goals, the celebration jar is those little pieces of paper will have things that help to motivate you to keep working towards your goal. So you could put buy a new sports bra, or try out a new yoga class, or get a massage, or, you know, sign up for a marathon, or it could be going out to a really nice dinner, whatever it might be. But this is a way to really use this trick of the celebration jar to be so in alignment with a goal that you are pursuing. Because you’re essentially feeding that need that motivation to keep moving forward. Because the way that you’re celebrating is in alignment to where you want to go. And so this is just another way if you are someone who needs external validation, external motivation, maybe thinking about it internally or, or reflecting on it internally does not do it for you, that’s fair, like always love and whatever whatever whatever is gonna make you want to keep showing up. If you need external motivation, this celebration jar is going to be the thing that you need to try. Okay. And finally, the last way that you can start to celebrate yourself more often, is to schedule out your celebration, I want you to start quarterly, and then go down to monthly, and then work your way down to weekly. Okay. And when I say schedule out your celebration. By that I mean, on your literal count calendar. After you have your goal, and you reverse engineer it, and you map out when you’re going to do your steps, right, all of my girls within my six weeks to accelerator will know that this what this process is you’re going to mark down on your calendar I am going to celebrate on this day. And in this way that could be go out to dinner that could be take the day off that could be booked that trip you want to do that could be go shopping, could be anything you want it to be, but you’re going to schedule it because some of us need that reinforcement to actually follow through with the thing that we know we should be doing. And in this case, it’s celebrating ourselves and sometimes just having it on our calendar holds us to it and I know that to be true because I put the smallest things on my calendar that I know I should just naturally do that. Sometimes I just don’t because I make up an excuse not to but if I see that thing on my calendar you know it’s getting done because my calendar runs my life and I mean that in a good way like that is not a toxic thing in my life to say and and that is something that you can use to kind of hack your brain to know that celebrating yourself was okay. So my calendar, it’s a date with myself, it’s a date with my husband, it’s going out with friends, it’s inviting people over to have a movie night to like watch a Hillary Duff movie, whatever it might be. But schedule out your celebration as you work towards a certain goal. Not only so you do it, but so you don’t forget about it, right? Like sometimes it’s just a little reminder that we need on our quarterly calendar that says, Hey, have you checked in with your I’m the coolest person I noticed. Or hey, when was the last time I told somebody else like what I was doing? Or hey, remember, you’re supposed to celebrate yourself right now write small little nuggets to remind yourself that you are the coolest person you know, and you should believe that to be true. But to also recognize that and celebrate the crap out of that. Because, again, when you celebrate yourself, you instill more motivation to keep moving forward. So there you have it, four easy ways that you can start to celebrate yourself more often, even if in this current season of life or in this current mindset that you live in. That just feels kind of blocked, like it just feels kind of gross, right? These are things that you can implement today. As soon as you listen to this episode. Tomorrow, as soon as you wake up and you practice gratitude, or later this afternoon when you sit down and you look at your calendar. My hope is that by using these small things, you can start to celebrate yourself more often, and stay more motivated as you work towards your biggest dreams. If you have any big takeaways from today’s episode, please please please grab a screenshot of your podcast right now on your phone and post it to your Instagram Stories tag me with your biggest takeaways, so I can re share them on my stories. I will be back again next week with a brand new episode. And until then, I am sending you all the sunshine, good vibes. And I hope you make it a great day girlfriend. Thank you so much for listening to today’s new episode. If you loved it, please send it to a friend share it on Instagram and tag me so I can see and consider leaving the show a rating or a review. Ratings and reviews are kind of like sharing or liking a post on Instagram and they really help the show grow and reach new women just like you. Be sure to subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a new episode. And until next week, I am sending you all the sunshine, good vibes and I hope you make it a great day.